Y’all, this is disgusting. We need to stop it immediately and acknowledge that they are PEDOPHILES truthfully, I don’t even gen this think they deserve the respect to be referred to as MAPs.
I just want a relationship where we are both equally obsessed with each other, but in a healthy way. Save my selfies when I send them to you. Text me “I know you’re sleeping right now, but…”. Take the time to listen to the songs that are important to me. Joke around with me and make fun of me and then kiss me right after. Tell your friends how happy I make you and how excited you’ll be when we are finally married. Double text me because you miss me. Reassure me when I’m feeling insecure. Grab my hand, hold me, show everyone I’m yours. Don’t hold back on me, tell me how much you want me and how much you love me. Make me happy and I will do my best to make you happier.
As someone who’s had anemia since only a couple weeks after her disorder started, I can tell you it’s one of the fastest happening downfalls of a restrictive diet. I am constantly tired, I’m pale and everything constantly feels weak and painful. I tell my doctor I get the proper nutrition which is such a lie to get iron caplets but even then it’s not enough. So here’s a warning: if you’re new here, and planning on restricting and under eating and fasting, leave. Now. It might feel good at first but within a couple weeks you’ll be weak, and you’ll be obsessed. Like I said; I’m not anywhere near under weight but because of my diet I am:
• constantly exhausted
• very weak, almost frail
• so so fucking pale, some days I look so much like a ghost people ask if I’m sick or if I’ve eaten today because I look like a *chubby* ghost
• My muscles are weak so even a small amount of exercise makes me feel sore
• A lot of times parts of my body hurt for absolutely no reason
So Please don’t do this. Just run. Get off this blog, get off these tags, get off this website. I promise it’s not worth it.
– your collar bones will so cute in bras and tank tops
No, your collar bones will be hidden under your patchy, acne-ridden, crusty, peeling skin. Also, collar bones are just a part of your anatomy. Don’t equate them to self-worth.
- your legs will naturally look more toned without having to work out
No, they’ll look like knobbly sticks. You’ll develop osteoporosis, your muscles will rot and the veins will stick out. You’ll develop all sorts of problems.
- you can borrow clothes from anyone no problem, they’ll always fit because you’re so small
No, you won’t be able to fit any clothes. You’ll only be wanting to wear baggy clothes to stop people looking concerned and about 100000 layers to stop feeling cold. And no one would want to give you their clothes, anyway, since eating disorders make you exceptionally moody and snappy.
- trying on clothes in the store isn’t embarrassing, its fun now
Not if they call an ambulance or you pass out and hit your head on the marble floor. And with your ED, you’ll never see yourself as underweight enough. Hint: choose recovery.
- youll look so elegant when you dance
No, you’ll look very very poorly and you’ll probably pass out after 10 seconds, anyway. You wouldn’t be allowed to join a dance squad in the first place once they saw how ill you were.
- when you drink coffee it will actually work better because there’s less fat to distribute it to
That makes no sense, whatsoever.
- your skin clears up because you arent eating trashy foods
No, you will develop a lot of acne and your skin will discolour and start to peel.
- people will worry about you and cater to you
Yeah, you’ll end up in hospital with a tube down your throat and family and friends blaming themselves.
- boys (or whomever you’re attracted to) will want ro protect you and hold you
No, you’ll be the moodiest person around. If you did get a partner, they would most likely be trying to get you into hospital.
- no more swaying flab on your upper arms when you wave!
No more waving, full stop. No energy for that.
- the less you eat over time, the less hungry you will grow to be
That’s false. There is always pain and symptoms. Always.
- youll have more money saved up to buy cute clothes or books or knick knacks instead of food
You’ll feel dead inside, you won’t care. You won’t be able to concentrate. Also, food is delicious.
- you can sleep at night without hating yourself
Complete opposite. You’ll hit an all-time low and probably get depressed and suicidal.
Please choose recovery. I know it’s not as simple as it sounds, but continuing to live under the delusion that there is a good point in your eating disorder is harmful.
Get rid of any apps, books and posters related to eating, dieting, fitness, etc. Anything that mentions calories. Instead, fill up your bookcase with colouring books, puzzle books and recovery books and stick positive affirmations around the house.
Know that the disorder is not about food. It’s about control), hence the disorder is a cousin of other conditions like OCD and OCPD. Be sure to ignore any preoccupations you have about other aspects of the concept and tell yourself that you’re in control, but that it has nothing to do with food and that the thoughts are just bullies.
Take up hobbies. Sewing, knitting, colouring, origami, reading, listening to music- anything unrelated to exercise (for the moment).
Wear oversized, comfy clothes and quit using the scale. Because your stomach will likely be swollen, you will experience a small amount of bloating as you recover, so it’s best to wear cosy clothes, and remember that it’s only a temporary thing.
Write or read about how much better it will be when you’re recovered. Watch out for toxic blogs that contain contrasting content, e.g. positivity one day and thinspo the next.
Create a fun meal plan. It can be themed, e.g. blue food day, Mexican food day, Harry Potter food day. Make sure it contains all the calories and vitamins you need to make a full recovery!
Don’t scold yourself for binging. Binging is your body’s response to being deprived of proper food. Try to adjust your meal plan to make sure it’s keeping you satisfied.
Try eating your fear food. It may sound like a big step, but eating food you used to love is a great move forward. If you feel uncomfortable, you can get a friend to make sure you don’t try and purge it.
Fake it ‘til you make it. Even if you have mixed emotions, pretend that you are the most pro-recovery person out there.
Remember that the ED is not a part of you. It does not define you or shape you in any way. It is a monster and a bully and its “goals” are not yours.
pain-lies-inside 