Rant: tw 24/09/18

So I’m meeting with a friend tomorrow, whom of which I haven’t seen for a year. One of my immediate thoughts was “wow, i haven’t changed much in the past year. I’m still fat”. Then I realized how long I’ve been like this (like end of 2017 to now) and its just, upsetting. And I realized he doesn’t know about my self harm or depression or disordered eating and just ahh. I have mixed emotions but also feeling numb at the same time