high-functioning-depression:

High functioning anxiety

People who suffer from high functioning depression often suffer from high functioning anxiety as well. And our anxiety beats us up daily, as well.

1. We decline invites even though we were excited for these events.

We get invited to a party, or an event, etc. and we are super excited to go there. We plan our outfit we are gonna wear that day and think about it constantly. But as soon as the day comes, we get really anxious. We fear that event so much, we cancel last minute and stay home. Where it’s safe for us. And therefore we miss out on a lot of stuff.

2. Obsession

We obsess over the tiniest things. Might it be a word or a glance from somebody. These little things wander around in our minds for days and we keep constantly thinking about it. Don’t get me started when someone doesn’t text back for hours/days. We start asking ourselves what we could have possible done wrong and wish we didn’t text in the first place.

3. Irregular sleeping pattern

We fall asleep late and wake up early. If we even fall asleep, that is. Our anxiety kicks in, when we gotta get up in the morning in order to go to work etc. Sometimes we don’t trust our alarm clock, so our anxiety wakes us up really early so we won’t oversleep. Meaning we are exhausted the next day.

4. Thinking about the worst

We can’t enjoy the moment, because we are always thinking about the worst scenario. Something will go wrong.

5. Rethinking

We keep rethinking conversation and event that happened to us a while ago. And we keep imagine what we could have done differently.

6. When someone asks if you are ok.

That’s a trigger for us. Because if they notice then it must be worse than we thought. And we don’t necessarily want to talk about it. But we also don’t like to lie.

7. Fearing the future

The future terrifies us. We really like to know what will happen so we can be ready for it. Not knowing stresses us out. Plus, the present is already tough for us, how much tougher will it be?

8. Constant comparing

We constantly compare ourselves to people our age. What did they achieve? How happy are they? Why didn’t we achieve all that already?

9. Mistakes

We can’t do mistakes, because our anxiety will always bring it up again and tells us that we are sooo bad. It doesn’t tell us that making mistakes is a part of life, it’s just bad.

10. Mentally tired

We wake up early, but are mentally drained and can’t get up on some days. Sometimes we need more time to get up.

11. Meeting new people

It’s so difficult. We constantly wonder if they like us. And if they are not coming to us to have a conversation with us, we just stick to ourselves and leave them alone.

Why can I relate to all of these?